Thursday, August 17, 2017


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source: Pinterest

One very deep awareness that hit me about a lot of us Nigerians is that we acquire things just because the people in our lives are getting/have gotten those things. Dogs not excluded. 
I'm still reading the book A Woman's Guide to a Simpler Life by Andrea Van Steenhouse, PH.D. with Doris A. Fuller which I first mentioned I started reading here.
I’ve met people who don’t even know what breed of dog they have. I would like to think that if you’re going to have something that significant you’d acquaint yourself with knowledge about it and why it would be appropriate for you. I’m thinking perhaps the not knowing why might be why some people get offended when you ask a simple question like “why did you get a dog?” or “why did you get this breed of dog?” or “what breed is your dog?” Or maybe asking such questions is just being nosy. Either way, unless you’ve talked about your dog enough I believe I see the sparkle in the eyes when people who love their dog get the chance to talk about their dog or anything else that they love.
Ah! Fashion! Dressing like a Greyhound when I’m a Pekingese or a Pekingese when I’m a Greyhound. 
·         Dressing like you’re going to space when you're to strut down a road on planet Earth (feel free to express yourself)
·         Dressing like a media person when you work in a corporate environment ( you know the rules)
·         Dressing down when you should be dressing up (hard to decide sometimes)
 I’m choosing to see the quote about Greyhounds and Pekingese to mean ‘dress the part’, ‘dress how you want to be addressed’
I was at an event once, just idly strolling and observing when I looked up and saw one of those bodyguard hybrids, no, not the commonplace bank securities. You know the ones that look like a cross between the terminator and transformers, with elbow and knee armors to boot? I very quickly mentally accessed myself of any metal objects that might trigger an arrest of my person, and suspended the idleness asap. Yea, they dressed the part. Me, I dress the part of an ordinary everyday girl, wetin I sabi
 Oh the appearances that fashion create. The intentions and assumptions. It does cause one to consider the question posed in the book: “What do you want people to know about you when you walk into a room?” My goal at this moment in my life is to appear simple, not perfect. Unless we’re talking Church. Guilty pleasures. Crucify me, but I've been longing to wear this gold lace dress I've had in my closet for sometime, can't wait to show you other ways I'm going to style it. It's gotten easier to choose clothes that matter from my wardrobe now that I have a minimal number.
Local shop bought dress / Rebecca Minkoff shoes

Disclaimer! None of the posts on this blog indirectly addresses a specific person.

Wednesday, August 16, 2017


I'm still reading the book A Woman's Guide to a Simpler Life by Andrea Van Steenhouse, PH.D. with Doris A. Fuller which I first mentioned I started reading here. I'm in the third chapter. Yes, I've been mindfully reading it and that means I've been reading it at a slow pace. The book was published as far back as 1996, but I still find it relevant for today. I'm on the chapter on Simplifying Our Ornamental Life. It's very appropriate for me at this point in my life as I told you here that I was struggling with a wardrobe purge/cleanse, which thankfully, I have achieved. How? I dumped it all out. Not everything though, but a lot of what I had purchased in the past years for varied reasons. I've come to a point in my life where my values have changed. Some things that used to matter don't matter anymore and vice versa. Have you had such a change in values? 

The book is true to its teachings in that itself is written in basic simplicity which is the core foundation of everything; the basics. Even when building a magnificent wardrobe one must begin with nailing down the basics; the bare bones on which flesh and muscles are built. It's still a work in progress, as is everything in life and yes there will still be items I will add to my now minimal wardrobe because it serves a purpose. One of such is this African Wax Print fabric which I got as an Asoebi. It served its role of letting me support someone in the way I could and equally allowing me to build up my 'African-ness' as I mentioned I am of the mind to purposefully build.  You will remember this fabric from when I wore it here custom-made into loose-fitted pants. Yes, same white off-the-shoulder top and same fabric in different takes. :-D Well, if I've been true to nothing, I've been consistently true to remixing clothing items in several ways, so that I don't have to go out to purchase a new item all the time, but instead I re-wear old items in new ways. How often do you re-wear your pieces? Do you do it enough times that you're satisfied you've gotten your money's worth? Are you itching for a wardrobe cleanse? Perhaps it's time to dump it all out. In another post let's talk about how to dump them out in a healthy way.
 Ok, so I really do need to ease up on these slides, don't I?

Tuesday, August 15, 2017


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A woman is an embodiment of nuances in psyche, and clothes sometimes help to express the varied aspects of her. When we feel our nurturing side out, our cattiness, our sweet girlishness, our industrialist, our vixen vibe, our pettiness.....all our virtues and vices, we choose clothes that let us express the dominant aspect on a given day. Hello, when there's a cat-fight about to go down, you know what jeans you will pull out of your wardrobe, as is what playful print when you're attending to a class of toddlers, or the demure dress that's appropriate for prayers, for instance. So, when you hear the word 'women fashion' it's not just about the clothes a woman puts on her body, it's about who she wants to be on a given day. You'll find that a woman could wear one simple skater dress a number of times, but on a particular day somehow the dress seems off and unpleasant for no other reason than because it just does not seem right for her mood or day goals. And then, a dress could sit in the closet for a long time and suddenly seem right on a given day. 
So, who are you today? How do you feel today? Plans for today, tonight or the weekend? 
Shop dresses for the woman you are or plan to be this weekend.  

Wednesday, August 9, 2017


African dressing is about vibrant colors and prints that never go out of style nor out of production, from the local Kitenge and Kanga in Tanzania to the Kente of Ghana and Akwete (Igbo) and Aso oke (Yoruba) fabrics to name a few there's culture and history in African dressing.
 African dressing timelessly resists being mellowed out by westernization, but for fluidity, acceptance and tolerance African dressing has adopted numerous western influences, yet the foundational keys remain same. Here are five tips to dressing African if you're not one, but find you're married to one, or if like a lot of millenials you're trying to regain your African-ness.

Keep your palette colorful: 
African women are into colors reflected through the vibrancy of African Wax Prints (Ankara) pieces
You will see earthy influences in African dressing: 
Cane, wood, seashells, bamboo, raffia, jute, bones.....It's all about looking natural in a polished way.
Africans wear the full regalia to an African party.
Incorporate an African piece into your everyday wardrobe: 
Ankara, Damask, Asooke, Kente, Adire, Akwete....
African dressing is not overly sexy nor restrictive, there's a fine balance to skin exposure

Tuesday, August 8, 2017


Nigeria being a land filled with people who do not completely grasp the concept of human and civil rights tend to get exploited in very many ways, especially by people who come in with far advanced knowledge about what constitutes human and civil rights and yet blatantly and arrogantly disregard rules and laws that they'd otherwise strictly adhere to in their own lands. By this I do not refer only to our country's aliens, even fellow Nigerians who have left the shores and returned are guilty of this, as are those of us who have never left our home country. There are very many things to which one is entitled, these are your 30 basic human rights and not another person's basic human rights. I had thought that I understood the concept of it all to a large extent until I struggled with a violation to my privacy beginning last year, which led to the loss of my Instagram which I talked about here when I had not exactly understood what I was dealing with. I, as much as every human, am entitled to my privacy and in the case in which I have been harassed, I am entitled to my privacy via cyber security. As much as I advocate the use of technology for its numerous benefits, even though I am not anywhere near a tech genius, like 2 on a scale of 1-10, I have come to acknowledge that technology could be used to violate someone's privacy through the installation of spywares. Spywares that record your environment and private musings and project your entire phone screen and details to be viewed on a wider PC screen even in a completely different timezone. If like me you deal with negative emotions via soliloquy in your privacy and practice talk therapy on how to handle difficult situations, you can imagine the harm when the intruder uses your musings to run your life or worse yet, run his business. So, you no longer only haggle with encroachment in your privacy, but also depersonalization and theft of ideas in an age where ideas and concepts are a huge business in content creation. 
Information about your health concerns, sexuality, habits, daily irks, even finances are collected. It's an evil and vile intrusion which I recently garnered is a real threat in our Nigerian society today. I am grateful to become aware of this as I begin to question what can be done about such in Nigeria. What I have learned so far is not to give physical access to your smartphone, to change your social media passwords often, to protect your phone's MAC number and if possible factory reset when you notice your gadgets misbehaving.
On a lighter note, I've had this outfit in my draft for a long while now, since I've had to first factory reset my entire gadget in order to attempt getting rid of any unapproved spyware installations I lost a few un-blogged outfit photos, but I have in mind to maintain a positive perspective about the photos and lost drafts; to see it as a chance to new and fresh thoughts and perspective as I handle what else is to come. Maintaining the brightness here in the midst of black with the orange tank top. 
Have you heard of Spywares? Have you had an experience with one? How were you able to resolve it? 

Friday, August 4, 2017


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When you consider what to wear to a wedding, do you think of a body con dress, a fit and flare dress or a maxi dress? What color of dress you'd like to dazzle in? Do you consider a red flare dress? Red is a passionate color and every daringly sexy woman wants to wear a red dress and leave an imprint on minds by the end of the day, besides it is Fall's hottest hue and celebrities world over are already been sighted #wearingred. So, thank me for giving you an early Intel on what color to wear come Fall/Autumn. You're welcome. The fabulous thing about red this season is that you are allowed to wear all shades of rules apply. Come, be that lady in red and enjoy your show-stopping moment on the red, blue or green carpet, whichever tickles your fancy to catwalk upon. You know, there really isn't any point wearing a red dress on a red carpet if it isn't a notable one. One with unforgettable detail like fringing, thigh-high slit or deep decolletage. Now, remember to keep it classy, not trashy. 
If you've wondered what color of shoes to wear with a red dress, I tell you all colors work with a red dress, depending on what message you wish to send.  Blue shoes with a red dress says 'playful', black shoes with a red dress says 'edgy', red shoes with a red dress says 'vixen', gold shoes with a red dress says 'elegant' and on and on and on. So, get on board and join the party of #LittleRedDresses ....and, ahem, mind the wolves dear. 

Thursday, August 3, 2017


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Reddy or not, here it comes.......the hottest color this Fall is Red. The fiery passionate color is back again. Be ready to fall for it. Time to dig into your wardrobe for that long forgotten red piece or shop  in stores for a hot new piece, especially for one with fringe detail. Maybe a shirt, a skirt....preferably a dress that's vibrant. There are lots of asymmetrical and artful options this season. From sheer mesh panels to cut outs, ruffles to origami, trumpet sleeves to cuff sleeves and ballooned hems, there's something for everybody. Red is the color of the vital force flowing in you, yes, it's red, not blue. It's a movement and statement on it's own and there's not one shade appropriate for this season. All shades of red are in. Scarlet, Crimson, Ruby, Burgundy, whatever suits your skin tone and if a daring red on your upper torso is a no no, you can't fail with red shoes, especially when there's a bow on them.

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